Koncocoo

Best Mood Disorders

Why Does He Do That?: Inside the Minds of Angry and Controlling Men
you will learn about: • The early warning signs of abuse. • The nature of abusive thinking. • Myths about abusers. • Ten abusive personality types. • The role of drugs and alcohol. • What you can fix, and what you can’t. • And how to get out of an abusive relationship safely. Bancroft, a former codirector of Emerge, the first U.S. program for abusive men, and a 15-year veteran of work with abusive men, reminds readers that each year in this country, two to four million women are assaulted by their partners and that at least one out of three American women will be a victim of violence by a husband or boyfriend at some point in her life.
Reviews
"In short, I wasted 35 years of my life with this man, who distorted reality and everything I knew to be true and tried his best to make me feel small and unworthy. He moved out of the house last week (I bought him out) and I have to say ... it is sad, but I've never felt more at peace with the decision and I am ALREADY much, much happier. NO ONE should have to live with someone who treats you like a child, or curses you out "just because that's the way he's feeling," or will not respect you or your career, or refuses to stop drinking or drugging, or who physically harms or threatens you."
"This book will stop making you feel sorry for your abuser."
"So, with a title like "angry and controlling men," they are more likely to pick up the book, thinking, "Hey, this might apply to the confusing situation I am facing." He can routinely blame her for everything that goes wrong in his life, or he can constantly critique her and tear her down, or he can call her names that when I tried to put them in this review, got it banned from Amazon. Abuse is not a binary kind of behavior that is only invoked when the fists fly, but a deeply ingrained, unrepentant attitude of ownership, entitlement, contempt and resentment that a man displays, not toward most people in his life, but toward "his" woman (including past women). This confusion is created by the abuser himself, in his highly successful attempts to justify himself to himself, to his victim, and to the people around him. Bancroft did not did start out with this assumption, by the way, but came to it after years of working with abusers in mandatory counseling groups. When he started out, he believed what the abusers told him about how their behavior was caused by their wives' failings, their traumatic childhoods, their unemployment, or the hurts done them by past girlfriends; that they didn't know what they were doing; that they "lost control." The abuser, meanwhile, is functional in his life at large (except when it comes to treating his wife well), and appears to be a sane, trustworthy person. Small wonder, then, that the abused woman, her friends, and society at large cannot figure out what her problem is. If they start from the assumption that the abuser is a decent guy who means well, they will never figure out the situation. For example, in one chapter Bancroft examines in some detail a frustrating conversation between a whiny, controlling man and his wife, which ends with him insisting on walking home in the cold, even though she would be willing to drive him. Of course, his main motive is to maintain the role of victim, to keep himself in the right and his wife in the wrong, so that he can tell himself (and tell everyone else later) how she "left him" to walk home in the cold. There is a fascinating, counterintuitive warning (late in the book), that women in abusive situations should not seek couples' counseling. The reassuring presence of the counselor might get the wife to open up and say things to, or about, her husband that she would never otherwise dream of uttering."
"Anger management will not help these people; they need to be in an abuse program. Because most abusers never change, the abuse program needs to consider the victims as their real clients, because they are the ones who will benefit most by feeling supported and validated, and they are a necessary component of the program to keep the abuser accountable. Interesting that the day after I read this in the book, I saw it on Facebook as a meme."
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The Dialectical Behavior Therapy Skills Workbook: Practical DBT Exercises for Learning Mindfulness, Interpersonal Effectiveness, Emotion Regulation & ... Tolerance (New Harbinger Self-Help Workbook)
A Clear and Effective Approach to Learning DBT Skills. Self-Help Therapy offers web-based treatment for borderline personality disorder (BPD) and emotion dysregulation based on the book The Dialectical Behavior Therapy Skills Workbook . "The individual struggling with overwhelming emotions and DBT therapists will benefit significantly from this workbook.
Reviews
"This year, I almost lost the love of my life because of my constant mood swings, negative thoughts, suicidal tendencies, degrading myself through words and action, overreacting to everything in the worst ways, aggressive and abusive behavior, and generally being a complete nightmare to be with. I don't know how to describe the book, but it was like finding a true blue best friend who wants to tend to your wounds and heal you from the inside out. Distress tolerance has showed me how to self-soothe myself through developing healthy hobbies, pleasurable activities, 'pushing away' a negative thought or emotion until you calm down, and pleasing yourself through your five senses, such as sucking on a candy when upset. Finally, interpersonal effectiveness has taught me how to ask for things respectfully and assertively from others without feeling guilty to avoid being aggressive, passive, or passive-aggressive, that it's okay to expect certain things from people (provided it is healthy for the two of you), to say no without losing relationships, and to avoid confrontations from blowing up and leaving behind damaged relationships. Here's a quick lesson that really has helped me with my negative emotions- sometimes we overreact and blow up because we have not been taught how to express our emotions and instead, bottle it all up inside until we boil over. I look at the world now with a healthier pair of glasses and I know I can withstand the challenges that will come my way, thanks to this amazing work. Matthew McKay, if you are reading this, know that you have saved a young woman from killing herself and ruining the lives of those who love her very much. You have done a wonderful service to those who feel that they are damaged forever, and you gave me the light at the end of my dark tunnel of mental illness."
"Good book."
"This one has great suggestions."
"A helpful and necessary book for anyone facilitating DBT groups, invaluable resource."
"It's a good book for the price, but if you're on the unending quest for new mindfulness activities, there are a fair number of repeats here."
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Feeling Good: The New Mood Therapy
The good news is that anxiety, guilt, pessimism, procrastination, low self-esteem, and other "black holes" of depression can be cured without drugs.
Reviews
"Don't know why some reviewers are saying it is not helpful for people with severe depression - maybe some people with severe depression need a different approach, but let me speak for the rest of us. I tried two different therapists, both of whom wanted to talk about other people in my life - my parents, my husband, etc. It's also true that there is the usual filler crap that you get in self-help books "Janet is a 40-year old dental assistant who came to me in 2005 suffering from..." blah, blah, blah. My depression is so much better that I am shocked. I can't express what that means to me, but if you have depression, I don't have to."
"Once you start reading this book, you will start to feel better."
"Working my ay through it."
"Recommended to me by a therapist...the book has good material, but is a bit difficult to get into."
"I first read this book probably 20 years ago, and it's just as timely now as it was then."
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Best Bipolar Disorder

Lab Girl
National Bestseller. Winner of the National Book Critics Circle Award for Autobiography A New York Times Notable Book. Winner of the American Association for the Advancement of Science/Subaru Science Books & Film Prize for Excellence in Science Books. Does for botany what Oliver Sacks’s essays did for neurology, what Stephen Jay Gould’s writings did for paleontology.” — The New York Times. “Lab Girl made me look at trees differently. It compelled me to ponder the astonishing grace and gumption of a seed. Perhaps most importantly, it introduced me to a deeply inspiring woman—a scientist so passionate about her work I felt myself vividly with her on every page. This is a smart, enthralling, and winning debut.” —Cheryl Strayed. Powerful and disarming.” — The Washington Post “Clear, compelling and uncompromisingly honest . Hope Jahren is the voice that science has been waiting for.” — Nature. Moving.” — The New York Times Book Review “A powerful new memoir . Think Stephen Jay Gould or Oliver Sacks. But Hope Jahren is a woman in science, who speaks plainly to just how rugged that can be. Offers a lively glimpse into a scientifically inclined mind.” — The Wall Street Journal “Some people are great writers, while other people live lives of adventure and importance. She makes me wish I’d been a scientist.” —Ann Patchett, author of State of Wonder “ Lab Girl surprised, delighted, and moved me. I was drawn in from the start by the clarity and beauty of Jahren’s prose. With Lab Girl , Jahren joins those talented scientists who are able to reveal to us the miracle of this world in which we live.” —Abraham Verghese, author of Cutting for Stone “Revelatory. A veritable jungle of ideas and sensations.” — Slate “Warm, witty . Jahren’s singular gift is her ability to convey the everyday wonder of her work: exploring the strange, beautiful universe of living things that endure and evolve and bloom all around us, if we bother to look.” — Entertainment Weekly “Deeply affecting. A totally original work, both fierce and uplifting. A belletrist in the mold of Oliver Sacks, she is terrific at showing just how science is done. She’s an acute observer, prickly, and funny as hell.” — Elle “Magnificent. a scientist’s memoir of a quirky, gritty, fascinating life. Like Robert Sapolsky’s A Primate’s Memoir or Helen Macdonald’s H is for Hawk , it delivers the zing of a beautiful mind in nature.” — Seattle Times “Jahren's memoir [is] the beginning of a career along the lines of Annie Dillard or Diane Ackerman.” — Minneapolis Star Tribune “A scientific memoir that's beautifully human.” — Popular Science “Breathtakingly honest. At its core, Lab Girl is a book about seeing—with the eyes, but also the hands and the heart.” — American Scientist.
Reviews
"Yet this book, which might better be considered a platonic love story to Bill, her long time lab partner, rather than a book about the life of a scientist, was tainted by the gleeful disdain that Jahren and Bill show for many other people. One day, Jahren does not heed multiple warnings and directs the graduate student driver to go straight into a snow storm. The student driver, understandably shaken, asks to be dropped off at the airport so she can fly home, but Jahren and Bill yell at her and refuse, calling her a quitter. Jahren and Bill enjoy giving their students a repetitive, meaningless task, like labeling hundreds of bottles, and then telling them that, sorry, they won't be using their work after all."
"I appreciate the way she incorporated her struggles with mental illness, women in science and university funding (which will make any tuition paying parent give a HARD look at the college they are paying to educate their child at) within the book but never came off as whiny or complaining."
"I do us because us is what I know how to do.”. ~Hope Jahren, Lab Girl. This book is a love story to life, plants, science, best friends, spouses, and parenthood. I especially loved the relationship between her and her friend Bill and how she described the depth of their friendship: “That no matter what our future held, my first task would always be to kick a hole in the world and make a space for him where he could safely be his eccentric self.”. And how she spoke of the depth of motherhood. “Every kiss that I give my child heals one that I had ached for but was not given - indeed, it has turned out to be the only thing that ever could.”. I recommend this to anyone looking for some inspiration from a true story told in an interesting way and I happily give this book 4 stars."
"I got this book because our local library (where I volunteer) has a program going on that involves the book."
"Her mental illness and relationship with her lab assistant (who likely has autism, but is able to make her botany research possible with his amazing ability to construct lab equipment and assist her in her field work) are themes throughout the book."
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Best Personality Disorders

The Only Girl in the World: A Memoir
Maude Julien's parents were fanatics who believed it was their sacred duty to turn her into the ultimate survivor--raising her in isolation, tyrannizing her childhood and subjecting her to endless drills designed to "eliminate weakness." "A harrowing yet achingly beautiful tale of a girl imprisoned by her brutal, fanatic family, but whose yearning for wonder and love ultimately drives her toward the improbable light of the world. The Only Girl in the World is a story of resilience unlike any I have ever read. The Only Girl in the World is the haunting story of a girl whose survivalist parents locked her away and subjected her to 'training' starting at the age of three. A tale of hope and profound courage, The Only Girl in the World illustrates how trusting ourselves and following our hearts can save us from the most oppressive and cruel conditions. "The year's most harrowing memoir...At times the book, in form, resembles the beginnings of Emma Donoghue's Room , but this text is necessarily more graphic and frightening...My multiple audible gasps while working through The Only Girl in the World were partly a result of its author's ability to so artfully capture the meaning and depth of her survival. You wonder how anyone who went through what she did could come out functioning on the other side...That The Only Girl in the World exists as it does is a most persuasive argument for Julien's remarkable willpower. "This story is never maudlin-it is so absorbing that you have to remind yourself to breathe from time to time. "A harrowing, gripping memoir of abuse and psychopathy...Julien approaches the past with fearless contemplation, veracity, and vivid portrayals of the brutality in her early life.
Reviews
"When she was three years old, Maude’s father, Louis Didier liquidated his assets and bought a house near Cassel where he took his wife and daughter to live in virtual isolation from the world around them. Thereafter, Maude’s upbringing was strictly regimented, physically demanding and devoid of human love and affection, in accordance with her father’s grand plan to raise a superhuman being. A host of sinister noises, little animals moving around in the dark, scurrying, running, stopping, rummaging and scuttling off again. I also have to cope without any of life’s pleasures, starting with delights for the tastebuds, which are the surest route to weakness. As the reader progresses through Maude’s account of her childhood and adolescence, it becomes patently clear that her father is delusional, but still manages to wield great power over his wife and daughter, indoctrinating them both with his bizarre ideas. The text is flawlessly translated from French by Adriana Hunter, and the author’s note to her English readers forms an important endnote."
"I was privileged enough to receive an advanced reader's copy of this book, and I just need to say up front that if there has ever been a book I've wanted to write a good review for, it's this one. Such as the family I’ve been blessed with, and the relationships I’ve taken for granted, and how the mountains I had yesterday are really just molehills. And I kept having to put the book down, because my throat hurt too much. It’s a book about the beauty of the human spirit."
"The Only Girl in the World by Maude Julien is a highly recommended memoir about a woman's abusive childhood - and her escape. Maude Julien's parents were fanatics and the torture she experienced under their supervision was supposedly done to strengthen her. He designed the education and cruel tasks Maude had to do and his wife helped him carry his plans out. The abusive things Maude was forced to do in order to strengthen her character are painful to read about. There isn't a lot of reflection or analysis by Maude as she relates what she had to endure and at times it feels just too unflinching in the recounting of the horror. It is also satisfying to know that an outsider, a music teacher, assessed what was going on and put a plan into action that would eventually help Maude escape her insane, controlling father."
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Best Obsessive Compulsive Disorder

A Womans Way Through The Twelve Steps
By drawing attention to how recovery raises special issues for women - from questions about sexuality and relationships to essential topics such as powerlessness, spirituality, and trauma - A Woman's Way empowers women to take ownership of their recovery and to grow and flourish in sobriety. Among the many articles and books written by Dr. Covington are: * Women and Addiction: A Gender-Responsive Approach * Awakening Your Sexuality: A Guide for Recovering Women * Leaving the Enchanted Forest : The Path from Relationship. Addiction to Intimacy. The following curricula include training manuals for professionals and complementary materials for participants: * Helping Women Recover: A Program for Treating Addiction (with a special edition for the criminal justice system). * Beyond Trauma: A Healing Journey for Women * Voices: A Program of Self-Discovery and Empowerment for Girls * A Woman's Way through The Twelve Steps.
Reviews
"I liked that the author included real women's experiences because it made the book relatable to my current situation."
"This is a great alternative to the Big Book of AA."
"I knocked a star off because it has quite a lot of unspoken assumptions about what experiences are common to women."
"As a 12 Step meeting attendee I still have and use the first daily reader which was given to me...I read it daily!"
"If you or someone you care about is in early recovery or even if you are in recovery a long time and could use a refresher, this book is phenomenal."
"So far, I can see why this book is for women."
"Awesome book to help a woman understand the 12 steps."
"I have used this with a group in the past and this is the second time I have used it."
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Best Depression

Feeling Good: The New Mood Therapy
outlines the remarkable, scientifically proven techniques that will immediately lift your spirits and help you develop a positive outlook on life. Now, in this updated edition, Dr Burns adds an all-new Consumer's Guide To Antidepressant Drugs, as well as a new introduction to help answer your questions about the many options available for treating depression. --Henny Westra, PhD, York University Anxiety Research Clinic, praise for the author FEELING GOOD FEELS WONDERFUL. The good news is that anxiety, guilt, pessimism, procrastination, low self-esteem, and other "black holes" of depression can be cured without drugs.
Reviews
"Don't know why some reviewers are saying it is not helpful for people with severe depression - maybe some people with severe depression need a different approach, but let me speak for the rest of us. I tried two different therapists, both of whom wanted to talk about other people in my life - my parents, my husband, etc. It's also true that there is the usual filler crap that you get in self-help books "Janet is a 40-year old dental assistant who came to me in 2005 suffering from..." blah, blah, blah. My depression is so much better that I am shocked. I can't express what that means to me, but if you have depression, I don't have to."
"Once you start reading this book, you will start to feel better."
"Working my ay through it."
"Recommended to me by a therapist...the book has good material, but is a bit difficult to get into."
"I first read this book probably 20 years ago, and it's just as timely now as it was then."
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Best Inner Child

ADULT CHILDREN OF ALCOHOLICS/DYSFUNCTIONAL FAMILIES
DISCLAIMER: This is the official ACA Fellowship Text that is Adult Children of Alcoholics World Service Organization (ACA WSO) Conference Approved Literature. The ACA Fellowship Text (commonly referred to as the Big Red Book or BRB) is a meeting book, Steps book, Traditions book, workbook, and group guide. While we are developing an audio book and considering the feasibility of large print books, we trust that the fellowship will be able to utilize e-readers to access the ACA Fellowship Text on e-readers that enlarge the print size and or read the book.
Reviews
"This book is amazing."
"I selected this book on a recommendation from a friend who is an Adult Child."
"I had struggled with some of these problems and patterns for my whole life, and had made some headway on my own in terms of figuring things out."
"The content of the book itself is extremely helpful if you come from a family where alcoholism, abuse or some other kind of dysfunction existed."
"Highly recommended."
"Although I have just started with an ACA group this is an excellent book to aid in breaking the additive patterns inadvertently inherited by our families of origin, whether alcohol and/or dysfunctional behaviors were present."
"The professional pieces by Charles Whitfield and Claudia Black are instructive and fit well into the overall project."
"I can relate to so much in this book, having grown up in a dysfunctional home, especially the part about "emotional neglect", which I had never heard about until I got into ACA."
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Best Emotional Mental Health

The Untethered Soul: The Journey Beyond Yourself
Singer shows how the development of consciousness can enable us all to dwell in the present moment and let go of painful thoughts and memories that keep us from achieving happiness and self-realization. Copublished with the Institute of Noetic Sciences (IONS) The. Untethered Soul begins by walking you through your relationship with your thoughts and emotions, helping you uncover the source and fluctuations of your inner energy. The accuracy and simplicity of this work is a measure of its pure mastery.”. ― James O’Dea , past president of the Institute of Noetic Sciences (IONS). It may take more than one reading and many hours of introspection, but The Untethered Soul is a must-read for anyone in search of greater understanding of themselves and of the truth.”. ― Louis Chiavacci , senior vice-president of Merrill Lynch, ranked in Barron’s top fifteen US Investment Advisors. “This publication has released boundless joy for the hungry souls of the world.”. ― Ma Yoga Shakti Saraswati, founder of Yogashakti International Mission and recipient of Hinduism Today’s Hindu of the Year 2000 award. Singer bridges these two great traditions in a radiant treatise on how to succeed in life from our spiritual quest to our everyday tribulations. With great eloquence, wit, and compelling logic, Singer’s brilliant book completes this thought by showing them to be two poles of the same selfless devotion.”. — Ray Kurzweil , National Medal of Technology recipient and author of The Singularity Is Near. Singer takes the reader on a journey that begins with consciousness tethered to the ego and ends having taken us beyond our myopic, contained self-image to a state of inner freedom and liberation. Michael A. Singer’s book is a priceless gift to all who have futilely searched and yearned for a richer, more meaningful, creative life.”. — Yogi Amrit Desai , internationally recognized pioneer of modern yoga.
Reviews
"I read the audio version of this book multiple times, bought copies of it for clients, and shared it with friends. After reading Michael's book, I simply allowed irrelevant, erroneous, totally made up thoughts to just float on by without attaching my emotions to them. It means you're no longer an emotional puppet on the string of everyone else's behavior, attitudes, decisions, choices, etc. I LOVED the audio version of the book because the person who read it was perfect for the content. I've read TONS of other books on similar topics but the way Michael conveyed the material was unique and different and I really GOT IT!"
"Some of the points made in The Untethered Soul are: 1. Learn to relax and stay open no matter what. Do not identify with the experiences you are observing. Facing the fact of bodily death can help you to realize that all of the observed is temporary. Do not allow painful experiences from the past to influence the present. If you want a life full of joy and love you must make a commitment to having a life full of joy and love. Learn how to live from your heart, not from your ego. The Untethered Soul is my second most favorite book on the subject of how to transcend the ego and how to realize the true Self and directly experience that perfect infinite consciousness that has only joy and love and has no suffering. My most favorite book on that subject is THE SEVEN STEPS TO AWAKENING which is a collection of quotes by these seven authors: 1."
"I see life and the spiritual journey differently, and though I do believe we all should strive for a happier life and a more peaceful spirit, I don't believe it is desirable to live without some unhappiness, some worries, some fears. The author contradicts himself many times, but more importantly doesn't indicate any awareness that he has contradicted himself. Thus, while the author makes many statements throughout that I agree with, he also constantly is making other statements that contradict previous ones, giving me the impression that he is just writing a stream of consciousness of statements cherry-picked to resonate with a broad range of spiritual-enlightenment-seekers, without much regard to whether those statements gel together to form a cohesive whole. Structure. I would not want to take that away from anyone, but sadly, it is not the book for me."
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Best Popular Psychology Mental Illness Books

Why Does He Do That?: Inside the Minds of Angry and Controlling Men
you will learn about: • The early warning signs of abuse. • The nature of abusive thinking. • Myths about abusers. • Ten abusive personality types. • The role of drugs and alcohol. • What you can fix, and what you can’t. • And how to get out of an abusive relationship safely. Bancroft, a former codirector of Emerge, the first U.S. program for abusive men, and a 15-year veteran of work with abusive men, reminds readers that each year in this country, two to four million women are assaulted by their partners and that at least one out of three American women will be a victim of violence by a husband or boyfriend at some point in her life.
Reviews
"In short, I wasted 35 years of my life with this man, who distorted reality and everything I knew to be true and tried his best to make me feel small and unworthy. He moved out of the house last week (I bought him out) and I have to say ... it is sad, but I've never felt more at peace with the decision and I am ALREADY much, much happier. NO ONE should have to live with someone who treats you like a child, or curses you out "just because that's the way he's feeling," or will not respect you or your career, or refuses to stop drinking or drugging, or who physically harms or threatens you."
"This book will stop making you feel sorry for your abuser."
"So, with a title like "angry and controlling men," they are more likely to pick up the book, thinking, "Hey, this might apply to the confusing situation I am facing." He can routinely blame her for everything that goes wrong in his life, or he can constantly critique her and tear her down, or he can call her names that when I tried to put them in this review, got it banned from Amazon. Abuse is not a binary kind of behavior that is only invoked when the fists fly, but a deeply ingrained, unrepentant attitude of ownership, entitlement, contempt and resentment that a man displays, not toward most people in his life, but toward "his" woman (including past women). This confusion is created by the abuser himself, in his highly successful attempts to justify himself to himself, to his victim, and to the people around him. Bancroft did not did start out with this assumption, by the way, but came to it after years of working with abusers in mandatory counseling groups. When he started out, he believed what the abusers told him about how their behavior was caused by their wives' failings, their traumatic childhoods, their unemployment, or the hurts done them by past girlfriends; that they didn't know what they were doing; that they "lost control." The abuser, meanwhile, is functional in his life at large (except when it comes to treating his wife well), and appears to be a sane, trustworthy person. Small wonder, then, that the abused woman, her friends, and society at large cannot figure out what her problem is. If they start from the assumption that the abuser is a decent guy who means well, they will never figure out the situation. For example, in one chapter Bancroft examines in some detail a frustrating conversation between a whiny, controlling man and his wife, which ends with him insisting on walking home in the cold, even though she would be willing to drive him. Of course, his main motive is to maintain the role of victim, to keep himself in the right and his wife in the wrong, so that he can tell himself (and tell everyone else later) how she "left him" to walk home in the cold. There is a fascinating, counterintuitive warning (late in the book), that women in abusive situations should not seek couples' counseling. The reassuring presence of the counselor might get the wife to open up and say things to, or about, her husband that she would never otherwise dream of uttering."
"Anger management will not help these people; they need to be in an abuse program. Because most abusers never change, the abuse program needs to consider the victims as their real clients, because they are the ones who will benefit most by feeling supported and validated, and they are a necessary component of the program to keep the abuser accountable. Interesting that the day after I read this in the book, I saw it on Facebook as a meme."
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